Birthdays are complicated.  It’s part “how lucky I am to be here!” and part “how can I be this old?!”  

I love receiving birthday greetings.  But a birthday card like this, “You know you are getting old when your boobs hang so low you can have a mammogram and a pedicure at the same time” is just plain offensive.   And the greeting card industry needs to hear about this.  A few efforts to combat ageism have produced cards like “You’re at the age when you realize they were all wrong about this age.” Or “Celebrating you never gets old.” A great improvement...

In a statement to AARP, Hallmark said it does have age-positive cards and is shifting its focus to a tone that “aligns with what people want to feel today — thankful, appreciative, wise and accomplished to be ‘getting older’ ”

Ageist birthday cards are reportedly best sellers in the multibillion dollar greeting card industry, so they aren’t going away anytime soon. 

But I won’t be sending you one.