We spent the 4^th of July weekend in the Berkshires.  It was hot, but beautiful.  Our host and hostess invited good friends to join us for lunch on Friday.

We hadn’t seen Jim and Janet in a couple of years, and after the “you look wonderfuls” we settled down to a great catch-up conversation about where we are in our lives.  We all have had our personal challenges, but we agreed that we lucked out in choosing our spouses.

Janet asked us if we “worked” at our marriages.  She said she does and that she loves doing it.

I never thought about whether our 45-year marriage takes work. I see that it takes acceptance of each other’s imperfections.  It takes knowing when to charge forward and when to back off.  It takes compromise.  It takes knowing when to be strong and when it’s OK to be needy. I’m not sure that is work.

The three couples at the luncheon table accounted for a century and a half of marriage, and we’re still counting.