On the rare occasions when I am really annoyed with Peter, I think of Ann Landers who in her famous advice column always asked complaining wives, "Are you better off with him or without him?" Of course I am better off with him. But that doesn't stop me from being annoyed at times.

For example, he's a keeper and I'm a throw awayer. I am always asking him if he's finished with the newspaper, a half-empty can of soda water, or a sweater he has owned for forty years but hasn't worn for thirty-nine.

Those pack-rat habits of Peter's don't really bother me, but here's one that does, and that got me into trouble on Friday. Peter will regularly buy things that we already have, or open a new package of something that we have a started package of. Or use the new apples before the old ones are gone.

This time he took a special trip to the grocery store while I was at work to buy gluten-free oats, now safe for people who, like me, are gluten-intolerant because they are grown in fields where wheat had never been planted. Peter is wonderful about trying to make my celiac disease restrictions less painful. He wanted to make granola, a favorite food I hadn't been able to eat for ten years. And he did.

But after I thanked him, I asked him if he had used the open package of gluten-free oats we had in our cupboard. He had not.

So, I said, "You are so bad about checking to see if we already have things." And he responded, "I thought you would think I was so good for making you granola."

He was so right, and I was so wrong. How could I?