Does Anyone Notice Us?
February 05, 2008
Unlike some of my friends, I never thought
much about whether or not as an older woman, I had become invisible--whatever
that means. That is until one spring day
about ten years ago when I was walking along a Manhattan Street with my young
friend Nina. Nina is stunning. Black hair, blue eyes, perfect pale skin and
a killer body. I noticed that men’s
glances lingered as we passed by. I
quickly figured out that I wasn’t the attraction.
I can live with that. I do not depend on the glances of men to feel
good about myself. Besides, I have Peter
who thinks I am still beautiful. That’s
what counts. Please, no comments about
the fact that he doesn’t see as well as he used to.
But something very nice happened last
week. A young colleague whom I
don’t know very well took me aside before a meeting. She asked if I had been
walking near the reservoir with my husband the previous Saturday, and I replied
that I had. This is what she told
me:
“On Saturday, my
partner and I were driving home from obedience class with our five-month old
puppy when we slowed down for some traffic near the reservoir.
We simultaneously let out an extended 'aaaaawwwww.' Walking along, with their
backs to us—was a distinguished-looking couple, each with lovely gray-white
hair. The woman had reached over and put
her arm around the man with such a tender and sweet gesture. He leaned into the small embrace.
While we felt that we had invaded a
private moment, we were both touched by the event. We remarked that we hoped that we still
touched each other like that when we were their age. At that point, we drove past
them, and I said to my partner, 'I know that woman!'”
Invisible? I don’t think so.
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